No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!