Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
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Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.