I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
