just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
