I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
try to milk me bitch
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