Already got asked if we're dating
love makes seman taste better
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
