Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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