my room smells like sperm. sweet.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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