Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
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I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
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Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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