everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
