so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
