I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
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Why is your signature on my underwear?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
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Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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