you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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