I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Randomize
