Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
