Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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