Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
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