Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
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