Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
