If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Duck Duck Cougar?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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