Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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