I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
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drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I will be naked everywhere
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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