the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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