the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
