is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
We need a shit load of segways right now
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
