Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
It was confusing and full of hummus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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