It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Just cropdusted the office
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Randomize
