I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize