so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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