Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
