scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
it hurts more in the daytime
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Randomize
