So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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