drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize