You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...