She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
