let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
