so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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