Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
should my penis look like a turkey
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
