I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
