when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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