I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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