don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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