Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
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