roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize