if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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