ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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