i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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