4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
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Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
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Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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