Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
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