there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
