Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
