I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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